Some things I have learned in woodworking

Most of this is "lifted" from a thread on a woodworking forum. But it's very funny and I thought it would be good to share. Feel free to add to the list, but nothing serious:

The dust collector will not do very well when its not turned on.
You will always have 50 times more sawdust then you thought you would.
You will always be short 2 bf of wood on a given project.
When you buy a new tool, within a week after your return time runs out, they will bring out a new better one at a cheaper price.
You can't keep all the scrap.
When you order something, it will always get there the day after you needed it.
Even if you have two walls of your shop covered with clamps, you never have enough.
Your air nailer will still make little holes even though there are no nails in it.
When you put your sacrificial fence on, you have to add the thickness to the fence ruler.
When you blow the chips out of a mortise, make sure you have your safety glasses on.
That glue you wiped on your pants will not dry by the time you sit down for dinner.
It's hard to remove dried blood from a concrete floor.
If you think you can build it for $50, you better have $150 set aside for it.
If you think it will only take a week, figure a month if you are lucky.
Your shop is never "done" until you are dead or otherwise quit woodworking.
The hardest skill to master is making a profit.
Getting an 18-guage brad into your body is not as painful as removing it, yet leaving it in doesnt seem like the right solution either.
Clamps and routers are like rabbits; they reproduce in their own.
Trying to make money at woodworking is a good way to ruin a perfectly good hobby.
Nobody ever regretted getting a band saw one size too big.
The best way to find out how easily a tool will break is to loan it to someone.
"He who dies with the most tools wins."
Don't quit your "day job" too soon.
NEVER use ChapStick when sanding.

D.D.

David DeCristoforoAuthor

David DeCristoforo possesses an extensive resume as designer/maker of fine furniture, high-end cabinetry and architectural woodwork. His experience in professional woodworking spans a period of 35 years. For the past 20 years David DeCristoforo Design has been located in Woodland, California. During this time David's shop has ranged in scope from a "full on" cabinet production shop with as many as 15 employees to a small fine furniture and custom millwork shop, working with his son, David RBJ, a highly skilled maker in his own right.